1. Don't the makers of Poseidon realise that their 'upside down' poster reads "No die sod"?
2. Why does everyone insist English players are incapable of playing 4-5-1 when they play it most weeks with their club teams?
3. Is there a good way to ask kids on buses to turn their mobile clips down? (i.e. without getting stabbed?)
4. When those Thames Water ads claim their new pipes are going to save 143 million litres of water a day, isn't that a rather roundabout way of admiting that's what they're currently wasting?
5. Did Endemol not realise that by having a 'secret' Big Brother house they've now ended up with more contestants than they had at the beginning?
6. Is Steve McLaren going to have 6 strikers at the European Championships, and is his 'masterplan' to play them all at once like he did at Boro?
7. How come Paris Hilton's single is far better than it deserves to be?
8. And how come Justin Timberlake's is so rubbish?
9. Hang on a minute - I saw Plymouth win some game 4-0 on the news last night. So was that the break between seasons then? What... TWO DAYS?? Blimey. Etc
10. Don't policemen look young these days? Or are they just those new-fangled Community Policemen?